Adam and Taylor barely survived that episode and no one knows what to say, it's a stretch but you can call what Cassie did "winning" (technically), Colton does a lot of fighting, Dave Rose pops in to explain the Global Financial Crisis, it's hard to explain feelings you don't actually have and the horrendous mistake of the Bachelorette selection overrides the entire thing.

Adam and Taylor have an actual special episode of the podcast (for 2 reasons), more montages summarize things it would be impossible to have missed by this point, Instagram is the point of being on this show now, Tayshia and Hannah handle their breakups very differently, Adam takes a mathematical approach to relationship strength and what if Cassie just isn't into him?

Adam and Taylor are replaced by a montage of what's already happened this season, everyone is talking at the same time about how they personally react to everyone talking at the same time, Demi is a certified monster who got shrunk down in a madman's chocolate factory, Caelynn still thinks she's winning and this whole thing is just an ad for ice cream.

Black or navy? (model is not actually Adam) https://bit.ly/2SHnnhe

Adam and Taylor go to Portugal and get simultaneously pensive and suggestive, Tayshia's been hiding something (but it's not her body), this podcast turns into an episode of Boy Meets World for a while, Cassie can't figure out how to say no and it's making us all uncomfortable, but this really could end about 100 different ways.

Adam and Taylor both have rants about the programming that precedes the Bachelor, it would be appropriate if we just copy/pasted the description from last year's hometown dates, Caelynn files paperwork to transfer her Mrs. America sash across state lines, Tayshia is the only contestant with an actual-sized family and Cassie didn't respond to a request for comment on this episode.

Adam and Taylor have finally come face to face with "the right reasons" and Taylor coughs in it, Tayshia names names, Caelynn was probably lying about her snowboarding experience too, Adam uses two of his college minors, Hannah B. forgets other people have their own free will and Heather picks the worst time to decide to leave.

You too can be a surgeon: https://www.walgreens.com/store/c/medline-scrubs-labcoat-unisex-knee-length-white/ID=prod6350089-product

Adam and Taylor say goodbye to almost half of the contestants, Colton and Hannah G. have a chemical reaction in the middle of a mud bath, that terrible date idea is actually called "vovinam," Sydney sinks into a really deep personal hell, Kirpa mimes her way through a 1-on-1 date and you should cover your mouth when you listen to this episode.

Demi's sex trap, reinterpreted: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFmgEUA_smc

Adam, Frank and Brittany barely survive Heather's first teethy kiss, Elyse ends her own road in the absolute best clothes she owns, mother nature proves to be more powerful than any makeup, Tayshia obliterates her percent, you can't spell love without B-O-A-T, Colton and Cassie teleport into bed and Brittany misses the Kirpa appeal.

Taylor and Adam tangentially almost sort of know someone who's kind of important to the Bachelor franchise, Tayshia and Colton form an adrenaline-based bond of modesty, Grocery Store Joe makes a comeback, 13 people is way too many for a walk-and-talk date, this audio show gets a visual upgrade, we're still talking about the Fyre festival and Demi will fight anyone about anything.

Superpermutations are real: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZzIvl1tbPo

Adan and Taylor plug an old Appliance back in, Hannah B and Caelynn swashbuckle all the joy out of a dinner theater date (and a whole episode of tv), Demi's ego just kicked the doors down and sauntered into a saloon, Elyse draws a firm line between two cohosts, is it enough to just be hot? and Colton can't run away from his overweight childhood past.

Learn more about the Herbst Appliance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDiarxFSv1Q