Adam and Taylor watch a reality train wreck uncut, unedited and in extended slow motion, Arie takes a chance on love but doesn't take a chance that Becca will murder him when the cameras are off, Chris Harrison wants to remind you that this is a new low for us all and Lauren B doesn't have much to say about it all.
Adam and Taylor keep up with the Kardashians, Kendall taxiderms as well as anyone with one operational eye, Tia's family can't afford a longer description, Taylor loves ketchup, Becca's family is nice but ain't got no alibi and Lauren's whole family smells like formaldehyde.
Editor's Note: Taylor doesn't know what happens at the end of The Beverly Hillbillies movie.
Owen Wilson is wowed by skiing - https://www.facebook.com/NBCSports/videos/10157183392375329/
Adam and Taylor judge people a lot more Olympically, Arie and Becca walk around Pisa and lean on stuff, if a bear saw Lauren in the woods, she'd survive because of her presumed deadness, bikes aren't a good date idea after your teenage years, Kendall is unviewable when naked and Tia picks the right time to forgo her percent.
Nate Silver on the Bachelor and Bachelorette: https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/the-bachelorette/
Where's the Bathroom? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJg1zRgkbno
Adam and Taylor say au revoir to the worst/best character on the show, Lauren B. goes on a date only Arie and necropheliacs would love, Taylor speaks French, Seinne would write this recap better than we do, it's not Kendall's fault that all the people she knows are dead animals and Jacqueline could win this thing if she would just get out of her own way.
Adam and Taylor are surprised by Maquel's re-existence, Arie doesn't care about Chelsea enough to Old Yeller her, no one matters, Arie's rib tattoo is as disgusting as it is enormous, short haircuts are way harder than you think and we like almost wrote a full sentence about this show like without like mentioning Krystal.
Adam and Taylor glam shame the entire cast, Seinne and Arie need more (or less) Lanco in their diet, Old Becca goes on a date with Lauren B's good face, just try taking Krystal's side, Baby Bekah can't rent a car for another three years and if you poured one out for Caroline, Jaqueline would drink it.
Adam and Taylor welcome a new guest host who fancies a luscious beard, someone portioned out contestant body parts all wrong, Tia misses a golden opportunity to body slam a group date, Lauren S. loses a date because she didn't wear a jumpsuit, Annaliese is afraid of everything but video reenactment flashbacks, there are finally some likable (furry) people on the show and Baby Bekah can't rent a car for another 3 years.
Adam and Frank take a few inaugural trips down the End of the Road, Lauren X survives another rose ceremony, Arie's date ideas are as bad as his racing career, Becca gives Arie the Averman fantasy date, Krystal might cry in the middle of this sentence and Seinne's aura could be used as an alternative energy source.
Adam and Taylor can't find any interesting information about Arie on the internet, where all of the interesting information about anyone lives, Arie Bekahs early in the rose ceremony then Rebeccas later, most of these women are interchangeable blonde things, most of these notes are about the wrong people and you get to watch Les Mis secondhand.